I realize we've only been officially at this for two days. I know challenging times are very likely ahead of us. But I love it. I love being with him, sharing with him, listening to him. I love being able to witness his enthusiasm for learning first-hand. I love how we can modify lesson plans moment by moment. I love how we can operate without lesson plans. I love my son!
On a different note, I had a visit with my endocrinologist today. He is perplexed at my labs and wants to investigate further. He mentioned immune disorder, and I deflated. He's giving me a month before more tests are to be drawn, and I hope that avoiding gluten in that time will affect my labs in at least a slightly positive way.
I did some internet research on autoimmune thyroid disorder and it is discouraging to say the least. I sat in front of the computer and cried this afternoon feeling completely defeated. The prognosis is so dismal! But I'm nothing if not strong and resilient, and I'm determined to create a positive outcome for myself. I've been passive for a long time and now I'm taking a more active role in my overall health. It may never go away but I'm so tired of it affecting my quality of life. I'm determined to live a full, energetic life. I'll do whatever I have to do to make that happen.
Look for fun pictures of our first week of homeschooling later this week!
Wednesday, August 28, 2013
Tuesday, August 27, 2013
Homeschool kicks off
Today was Day 1 on the books. Although I feel every day is a day of learning and educational opportunities, today was the first day we took attendance for record purposes. It went very well. At least three times in the middle of our day Doran exclaimed, "I love home school!" Guess we're off to a great start!
Friday, August 23, 2013
Gluten is my enemy
At least I think it is. It's a long story but here's the most shortened version I can offer. I was officially diagnosed with hypothyroidism at 18, took medication faithfully for 2 years, stopped for 8, managed to get pregnant, medicated again to avoid birth defects, stopped for 2 more years, then had a ridiculously abnormally high TSH reading (we're talking hundreds of times higher than the range of normal...the doctor was impressed I was even still able to function) and resumption of faithful pill-popping ever since. However, in spite of my diligence and full compliance to medicating myself, my TSH is still significantly elevated after a year.
My initial response was indignation. After all, I had given up alcohol, lost nearly 30 pounds, started eating more whole foods, moving my body more, just generally truly trying harder and still, STILL I had a problem. WTH?! How could this be?!
Then my ex mentioned something he discussed with his current health practitioner, and it involved gluten intolerance. I vaguely recalled reading an article a while back about gluten intolerance being connected with autoimmune disorders like Hashimoto's thyroiditis (official diagnosis), and so I decided to research again. There's definitely compelling evidence regarding the link to gluten and malfunctioning thyroid glands, and I'm finally willing to give the whole gluten-free thing a try.
Right now I'm feeling excited and sad at the same time. Just last night a friend of mine was trying to educate Doran on the food groups (albeit with outdated information), and we ranked our favorites. Breads and grains were my #1. I'm a bread and pasta junkie for sure. How am I going to just give that up so easily? And that's just scratching the surface. Can I truly be as diligent as I'd need to be?
Then I think about getting lab results that show my medication needs to be reduced until maybe, just maybe, I can do without it completely and suddenly those sacrifices seem so trivial. So I'm going to give gluten-free a shot, but not until I've said a proper good-bye. So I'll spend the next week enjoying the wheat products I've loved and accepting that my quality of life is more important than any food I could ever eat. And anyone who knows me knows that's a powerful statement to make.
Here's hoping for miracles!
My initial response was indignation. After all, I had given up alcohol, lost nearly 30 pounds, started eating more whole foods, moving my body more, just generally truly trying harder and still, STILL I had a problem. WTH?! How could this be?!
Then my ex mentioned something he discussed with his current health practitioner, and it involved gluten intolerance. I vaguely recalled reading an article a while back about gluten intolerance being connected with autoimmune disorders like Hashimoto's thyroiditis (official diagnosis), and so I decided to research again. There's definitely compelling evidence regarding the link to gluten and malfunctioning thyroid glands, and I'm finally willing to give the whole gluten-free thing a try.
Right now I'm feeling excited and sad at the same time. Just last night a friend of mine was trying to educate Doran on the food groups (albeit with outdated information), and we ranked our favorites. Breads and grains were my #1. I'm a bread and pasta junkie for sure. How am I going to just give that up so easily? And that's just scratching the surface. Can I truly be as diligent as I'd need to be?
Then I think about getting lab results that show my medication needs to be reduced until maybe, just maybe, I can do without it completely and suddenly those sacrifices seem so trivial. So I'm going to give gluten-free a shot, but not until I've said a proper good-bye. So I'll spend the next week enjoying the wheat products I've loved and accepting that my quality of life is more important than any food I could ever eat. And anyone who knows me knows that's a powerful statement to make.
Here's hoping for miracles!
Tuesday, August 20, 2013
Finding My Groove
Starting the homeschooling journey feels so much like starting the parenting journey. You read, you study, you take a break from reading, you try some ideas out, then you panic and go back to reading some more. After all, there's so much to know! So many opinions on the same subject, how can you ever decide which one is best.
It seems there are plenty of experts on how to educate your child, whether at home, private school or public school. I've read articles, books, editorials, blogs, etc. by many of them and feel just as scared and uncertain about this step as I did when I first brought my bundle of joy home. One mistake and I'll ruin everything!
Thankfully I know better than that, and now it's time to step away from all the reading, abandon any and all official labels, and just be with my son, listening to him, working with him, experiencing life with him. And if anyone is going to be the expert on him, it's going to be me.
It seems there are plenty of experts on how to educate your child, whether at home, private school or public school. I've read articles, books, editorials, blogs, etc. by many of them and feel just as scared and uncertain about this step as I did when I first brought my bundle of joy home. One mistake and I'll ruin everything!
Thankfully I know better than that, and now it's time to step away from all the reading, abandon any and all official labels, and just be with my son, listening to him, working with him, experiencing life with him. And if anyone is going to be the expert on him, it's going to be me.
Monday, August 19, 2013
Now it's really official
Doran is officially withdrawn from public school. Let the new adventure begin!
Thursday, August 15, 2013
The Way Back
As I've been mulling over different styles of homeschooling and considering what might work best for us, I've also been trying to decide when to start. Tonight it occurred to me that we would not be "starting" anything. Rather, we'd be returning to the way of learning we embraced in the beginning: following our bliss.
Doran and I had a great conversation today after I revealed to him (with his "permission") who his teacher would have been for first grade. We talked about his experience in kindergarten, what events were good for him and which ones were bad. One instance in particular stuck out for both of us, an occasion when he expressed feelings of frustration regarding his pairing of reading partner (she was still struggling with letter recognition at the time and he was reading fluently and independently). He shared with me for the first time today that he feels it was at that moment that he became less interested in reading.
My heart broke hearing his honest confession, and I remembered my own reaction to the phone call I received about the incident. I automatically took the teacher's side and made my son feel guilty for having needs that weren't being met in the situation. I apologized to him today and thanked him for sharing with me. It was eye-opening to say the least.
So as I think about when we'll start this new adventure, I realize that we're not really starting anything. We'll just be returning to the philosophy that worked well for us in the beginning: play has worth and learning is more meaningful when done in an environment of joy and pleasure. What a timely reminder for both of us!
Doran and I had a great conversation today after I revealed to him (with his "permission") who his teacher would have been for first grade. We talked about his experience in kindergarten, what events were good for him and which ones were bad. One instance in particular stuck out for both of us, an occasion when he expressed feelings of frustration regarding his pairing of reading partner (she was still struggling with letter recognition at the time and he was reading fluently and independently). He shared with me for the first time today that he feels it was at that moment that he became less interested in reading.
My heart broke hearing his honest confession, and I remembered my own reaction to the phone call I received about the incident. I automatically took the teacher's side and made my son feel guilty for having needs that weren't being met in the situation. I apologized to him today and thanked him for sharing with me. It was eye-opening to say the least.
So as I think about when we'll start this new adventure, I realize that we're not really starting anything. We'll just be returning to the philosophy that worked well for us in the beginning: play has worth and learning is more meaningful when done in an environment of joy and pleasure. What a timely reminder for both of us!
Blueberry picking
Despite several posted warnings about bears in the area, Doran and I decided to see if the blueberries at Graveyard Fields were ripe for picking. As you can tell from this picture, they were not quite ready. We picked a few anyway and enjoyed a quiet, bear-free hike.
Now the temperature has dropped and it feels like Fall. As that is my favorite season, I'm not complaining. Time to break out the crock pot and to start diligently knitting!
Tuesday, August 13, 2013
Exploring Options
Unschooling. The word excites and frightens me. It is in complete opposition to the educational system with which I grew up and yet it is so deliciously appealing. I sit and imagine what my son's experience of life would be if he was free to explore his own interests in his own time. What would my experience be like? How would he grow and how would I change? I'm so acutely aware of my control issues and just the idea of releasing them so drastically brings an exhilarating sense of freedom.
But I still have a hard time wrapping my mind around it. No curriculum? At all? But I love curriculum! No schedule? No checklists? What about that state-mandated assessment test he would need to complete at the end of each school year? Will he be able to "make it" in the "real world" without formal education? That requires a great deal of trust not only in him but in me and the world around me. What an intense test of faith.
And the TV/video game issue, not to mention chores and allowance. Can I trust my child to eventually learn to self-regulate how much time he spends in front of the computer or TV? Part of me says, "Yes. Take today for example." He and I had no vehicle so we walked to the library, then to lunch, then to ice cream for dessert and finally back home. He played computer games for about 30 minutes before we moved onto playing board and card games. Several hours later we watched TV together, snuggling on the couch, laughing at slapstick comedy. We then read a great book, chatted one last time, and it was time for him to go to bed. We stayed so busy with being together that he barely asked for screen time at all. It was a good day.
I've said frequently that I just want my boy to be happy. I also want to raise a sensitive, compassionate, responsible person who contributes to the world around him in some way. I have just enough romanticism to believe he can be all of that and just enough practicality to find the way to make it happen.
But I still have a hard time wrapping my mind around it. No curriculum? At all? But I love curriculum! No schedule? No checklists? What about that state-mandated assessment test he would need to complete at the end of each school year? Will he be able to "make it" in the "real world" without formal education? That requires a great deal of trust not only in him but in me and the world around me. What an intense test of faith.
And the TV/video game issue, not to mention chores and allowance. Can I trust my child to eventually learn to self-regulate how much time he spends in front of the computer or TV? Part of me says, "Yes. Take today for example." He and I had no vehicle so we walked to the library, then to lunch, then to ice cream for dessert and finally back home. He played computer games for about 30 minutes before we moved onto playing board and card games. Several hours later we watched TV together, snuggling on the couch, laughing at slapstick comedy. We then read a great book, chatted one last time, and it was time for him to go to bed. We stayed so busy with being together that he barely asked for screen time at all. It was a good day.
I've said frequently that I just want my boy to be happy. I also want to raise a sensitive, compassionate, responsible person who contributes to the world around him in some way. I have just enough romanticism to believe he can be all of that and just enough practicality to find the way to make it happen.
Thursday, August 8, 2013
It's official!
Open Minds School of Discovery is officially registered and legal for operation as of Tuesday! I still have to withdraw Doran from public school, but the biggest part of the process has been completed. Now to get started!
Even though we are legal, we won't officially begin taking attendance for at least a couple of weeks. While I've been steadily and eagerly assembling materials and reading, reading, reading, I still have some loose ends to tie up before jumping in to our next big adventure. I have been on a roller coaster ride of emotions the past couple of weeks, trying to listen to my heart (and my son) and tune out other people's expectations. I'm a people-pleasing approval seeker but my heart's desires are often unconventional, so one can only imagine the inner turmoil I experience on a regular basis. Ultimately I've had to accept that there is no "right" answer in this situation. I've had to make a choice between two appealing options and hope my intuition leads me well as it has many times before.
So I'm nervous and excited and eager to see what adventures await! I know we'll face challenges and I may even feel like giving up, but I know neither one of us will be the same for the experience, and that feels just wonderful.
Best of all, I have a new-found reason to blog more frequently (I know, I know, I've said that before). I think this will be a great way to document our experience. I'll even schedule time into our day for it. Goodness knows that's the only way it'll get done!
Even though we are legal, we won't officially begin taking attendance for at least a couple of weeks. While I've been steadily and eagerly assembling materials and reading, reading, reading, I still have some loose ends to tie up before jumping in to our next big adventure. I have been on a roller coaster ride of emotions the past couple of weeks, trying to listen to my heart (and my son) and tune out other people's expectations. I'm a people-pleasing approval seeker but my heart's desires are often unconventional, so one can only imagine the inner turmoil I experience on a regular basis. Ultimately I've had to accept that there is no "right" answer in this situation. I've had to make a choice between two appealing options and hope my intuition leads me well as it has many times before.
So I'm nervous and excited and eager to see what adventures await! I know we'll face challenges and I may even feel like giving up, but I know neither one of us will be the same for the experience, and that feels just wonderful.
Best of all, I have a new-found reason to blog more frequently (I know, I know, I've said that before). I think this will be a great way to document our experience. I'll even schedule time into our day for it. Goodness knows that's the only way it'll get done!
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